faith Archives - Page 10 of 10

All Things for Good

Post author:Gina B
Post published:February 4, 2013
Post category:faith

I wasn’t supposed to see my grandma that Thanksgiving.

We had plans to drive to Wisconsin, but because our shipment from overseas finally arrived, my husband flew to Orlando to receive it. My parents were going to visit my grandma at the nursing home. I decided to go with them because it might be the last time I saw her.

It was.

Upon reflection, we see that decisions we make, or things that happen to us beyond our control, were the work of God.

My grandmother passed away several months later. Her funeral was scheduled for a Wednesday. Due to some family issues, they changed it to Saturday. Wednesday did not work for me because my husband arrived home that day from a trip. I found frequent flyer tickets. Erik had a couple days off of work to stay back with the kids. All those things added up to me being present for my first family funeral since 1999.

He works all things for good. I look back on my life and there are some events – our son’s birth, our move to Singapore, two years of illness, our move back to America – where, on paper, it didn’t look the way I planned it. Circumstances I did not choose, seemingly ordinary decisions, plus God’s impeccable timing – they all interwove to create something better than I imagined.

I might not have said it at the time, but afterward I can look back and see a God who is tender hearted, who cares about the details, who does indeed work all things for good.

If I can see it so clearly in these circumstances, how many other times did He work on my behalf and I just didn’t recognize it? And how many more will there yet be?

Better Things Ahead

Post author:Gina B
Post published:January 25, 2013
Post category:faith grief

This week has left me a little speechless. On top of the emotional roller coaster of starting our kids in school and Erik being gone, death came twice: a dear family friend, and my sweet grandma. The first was wholly unexpected, the kind of death where you say, “But I just saw him . . . but he just . . .” It’s stunning.

The second was a long time coming. My grandma was nearing 100 years old, and in recent years has been in a slow decline physically and mentally. This last week she’d stopped eating and wasn’t responding much to people. She’s finally free.

All this brings into sharp focus the frailty of life, the fact that at any moment things could change. So I find myself delighting more in things I could easily miss – the sound of my son’s voice from the back seat of the car, the new blossoms on our lemon tree, the sun rising through hues of pink, breath in my lungs.

But it also makes me realize how far we are from Eden, how this world is nothing compared to the next. I think of our friend, who had a beautiful voice, and I imagine him singing praises to his God in a way he never has before. I think of my grandma whole, restored, full of joy. I think about how all that we enjoy and love here is but a poor substitute for what is to come.

So let’s love well and be people of gratitude and wonder for the gifts we are given, but let us put our hope in eternity where all will be made new.

“There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.” C.S. Lewis

Feed on Faithfulness

Post author:Gina B
Post published:December 23, 2012
Post category:faith transition

Do not let the current state of our house fool you.

Though people who visit express astonishment at how “settled” everything looks, mine is not a settled heart. Perhaps our zeal to get the house in order quickly is partly a way to occupy our hearts. It distracts them, and makes them think they are settled too.

It’s also evidence that this isn’t our first rodeo. We know we’d rather go great guns at the beginning rather than drag out the process of unpacking and decorating.

Truth be told, my heart feels untethered. Lost. I miss knowing and being known. I remember now Ethan’s “my heart is tired of all the new things.” The new things make my heart feel like it’s climbing a mountain. The last few days I’ve let myself linger in these feelings a little more, shed some tears.

I search the scripture for some balm. What I really want is for something to make it all go away – something to satisfy my need to feel found, rooted, known. Part of me knows I am all these things in God, but feelings don’t so quickly follow reality. I hope He will give me something more.

What I find is not satisfaction but hope. Psalm 37:3 says, “dwell in the land and feed on faithfulness.” I know that for my heart to move toward satisfaction it will take courage, faith, endurance, and lots of time.

In the meanwhile, I feed on His faithfulness to me. I recall the transitions of my life and I have hope. He has proved Himself good to us again and again. He is El Roi, the God Who Sees. Jehovah Jireh, the One Who Provides. Immanuel, God With Us. I will feed on this.

“At an acceptable time, O God . . . answer me in your saving faithfulness.” Psalm 69:13

The Slow Boat From Asia

Post author:Gina B
Post published:November 20, 2012
Post category:faith

Anyone else remember this book? I didn’t read it, maybe because I never had trouble getting my locker open.

Today, my book is titled, “If God Loves Me, Why Can’t We Get Our Stuff Off the Slow Boat From Asia?”

I’m guessing that sweet 70’s era book might have a good answer for me, so now I’m kicking myself for not pulling it off the church library shelf, but I have a pretty good idea what it would say.

I think it might tell me to give thanks in the midst of circumstances so that’s what I’m going to do. I’m thankful that:
1. Our stuff did not fall in the ocean.
2. We are not like those people we met who shipped their stuff to the US and didn’t get it for a year (Oh Lord, please don’t let us become those people).
3. We have had a place to stay while our stuff has been sailing the seven seas
4. Erik has been able to do other things to get our house ready, so these two trips haven’t been wasted
5. We have things to ship. Lots of things. A lot of people don’t have anything.
6. This is a light and momentary trial, especially compared to what so many are going through.
7. It’s kept us on our knees.
8. God is still God, and He is still good.

It’s this last one that I wrestle with in times like this, and I think that’s good. It’s good because it makes me think about what goodness to us really is – not our comfort or our happiness, but something much bigger and better. It’s good because it reminds me that God is not our vending machine, our Santa Claus, our butler, who does what we ask. when we ask. It’s good because it puts me in my place, a place of being very small and insignificant, which is why the fact that He loves me still is even greater.

I think I know what to do if I can’t get my locker open.

Lest you forget

Post author:Gina B
Post published:September 11, 2012
Post category:faith

“And when the Lord your God brings you into the land that he swore to your fathers . . . with great and good cities that you did not build, and houses full of all good things that you did not fill, and cisterns that you did not dig, and vineyards and olive trees that you did not plant – and when you eat and are full, then take care lest you forget the Lord.” Deuteronomy 6:10-12

The first time these verses struck me (as Christians why are we always being “struck” by scripture? It seems so violent) was our 5th year overseas. I was in a great place. My mojo was strong – the kids were getting out of the tough toddler stage, my language skills were decent, I was able to use my gifts in fulfilling ways; in short, I loved my life. So I knew it was going to change.

I knew it, not because I think God is out to spoil my fun, but because of these verses which I had been studying at the time. I knew I was in a place where I was really comfortable. I didn’t feel like I needed God. I was in danger of forgetting Him. So God saw fit to move us, four months later, to Singapore, where . . . well, let’s say I felt my need.

But that was then. In reading this again now, I think of our current situation. This is the land o’ plenty, and I feel like I could get pretty used to it. I like showers with consistent water temperature and washing machines large enough to hold a person. I like blue skies and non-threatening traffic. I like speaking English. I like friendly Minnesotans.

So how do I not forget God here? How do I stay aware that even in the seemingly best, most comfortable, most easy places I am in desperate need for Him? I don’t have the answer to that yet; it’s what I’m pondering this morning. I just know that He is God here as much as He was there, and I need Him.

Looking with Eyes of Faith

Post author:Gina B
Post published:September 9, 2012
Post category:faith transition

Prior to moving back to America, I read the story of Moses sending the spies ahead into Canaan.

All but two of them came back with a report that, although the land was flowing with milk and honey, the people there were strong and the cities fortified and large. These latter things were unappealing to them.

But then Caleb stepped up and said, basically, “We can do this.”

Joshua seconded that with, “If the Lord delights in us, he will bring us into this land and give it to us . . . the Lord is with us.”

Looking Ahead to Our New Season

I read this story around the time when our son seemed to be struggling the most with our future life in America. He’s a realist, like me (it sounds so much better than pessimist), and he was seeing the difficulties of transitioning to new friends, new places.

So I shared that story with him. When I read it, I felt clearly that God was saying, “Who will you be like Gina?

“Will you look ahead and only see the obstacles, or will you look ahead with faith and hope because you believe that I am leading you to this place?”

We might see the same situation, but we could look with eyes of fear or eyes of faith. Which will we do? As we look through the lens of God’s delight in us, we can move ahead with confidence. He goes before us. He goes with us. We can do this.

It’s hard to go into an unknown place after one you’ve loved so well. But this morning as I sat on the deck, warm sun on my face, I was encouraged by recalling this story. I’m not saying Orlando is the promised land. But it is the place to which He is leading us. We will trust in His goodness as we anticipate life there.

Looking Ahead to Our New Season

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