Blog - Page 21 of 35 - Gina Brenna Butz

The House Checklist

Post author:Gina B
Post published:May 2, 2014
Post category:transition

People often ask me here, “So, are you in Orlando for awhile?”

And I answer, “Yes” warily, like I’m putting all my chips on red and crossing my fingers.

The reason is that I have never been in a place I thought I might stay. It’s hard to imagine that we could be here for 10 years or more. To date, Erik and I have lived in eight places in 16 1/2 years, if you don’t count my parents house (and we should, because actually altogether we’ve probably spent more than 2 of those years living with them on trips back). You can understand why I don’t have a long term mentality about housing.

On the one hand, there’s something appealing about being grounded. I bet I would know a place well if I lived in it for 20 years. Our kids could say, “This is where I grew up,” at least partly. On the other hand, I hear people talk about other places and a part of me says, “Where do I sign up?” The thought of one place for that long sounds kind of boring.

I have a list in my head of how long we have lived in different houses, and I am mentally checking them off as we pass each mark. So far, we have lived in Orlando only longer than the foreign student dorm (three months) and Bi Shui (13 months). Next up is our Minneapolis apartment at 17 months, followed closely by Euro-Asia Park at 18 months. Already, it’s feeling like we’ve been here “awhile.”

I don’t know if we’ll be here a long time or not. I guess I’m learning to hold places loosely. We’ll see if Orlando earns the record of “longest stay.”

What I’ve Learned About Orlando

Post author:Gina B
Post published:April 28, 2014
Post category:transition

After just over a year in Orlando, I’ve learned a bit about my new surroundings:

1. There are not many palm trees. I thought I was moving to a tropical location, but it’s populated by pine trees (especially our area, aptly named Isle of Pines) and deciduous trees. I could believe I’m in northern Minnesota, unless I’m at the beach or Disney, where palms do grow. Ok, technically we do have a palm tree in our backyard, but it’s not natural. I thought there’d be more palms.

2. I can need my sunglasses and my windshield wipers alternately and repeatedly within the span of a few miles, as the weather here is ever-changing.

3. There are no tornado sirens here, even though there are tornadoes, so the impetus is on you, fair citizen of Orlando, to prevent your own demise.

4. There is a lot of wildlife. I am not accustomed to this, as in China there was only the occasional bird or cockroach. Here I’ve seen armadillos, snakes, raccoons, possums, deer, vultures, sand cranes, and one gator. Only one.

5. I’ve said it before, but I was told there’d be gators. I’m so disappointed. I’ve only seen one, and when I did I freaked out like a kid on Christmas.

6. I should have kept up on my Spanish. One phrase I do remember, that I’m hoping I can pull out sometime is, “Ayude! He caido y no puedo levantarme. Y estoy teniendo dolores de pecho!” One of these days, I’m going to need that, and all those years of Spanish will pay off.

7. Orlando likes to build community sub-divisions, like the Truman Show. I expect everyone to pull out of their garages at the same time and drive to work.

8. There are beautiful sunsets here. They’re so common that my standards for what constitutes a worthwhile sunset have risen quite high.

9. I still need a winter wardrobe, but for the indoors, just like in Singapore. People typically set the thermostat at 70 degrees. To me, 90 and above is shorts weather. 80 to 90 is cropped pants weather. below 80 is call for pants. Below 70 requires layers. Hence, winter wardrobe.

All in all, I like it. It’s fun to get to know a new place, to add it to our collection of places we know and love. Come on down and visit – we can sit under the pines, watch the sunset, and look for gators.

Two Battles

Post author:Gina B
Post published:April 17, 2014
Post category:faith

Two Battles – from Thailand, January 20, 2012

I’ve been trying to think of how to share what we’ve been doing this week here in Thailand (aside from trying not to get sunburned, reading Kindles by the pool, and searching in vain for Coke Zero). We’re at a conference called re-LEAF (Leadership Evaluation and Formation). It’s a time to revisit the process that God started when we all went through this conference the first time.

So how do I summarize what it is we talk about here? I thought this excerpt from The Magnificent Defeat, by Frederick Beuchner might do it. He’s talking about “The Two Battles” Forgive me if it’s a little long – I cut a lot out!:

“The first is a war of conquest . . . All our lives we fight for a place in the sun . . . we feel that we must conquer a territory in time and space that will be ours. And that is true. We must.

“What is the armor to wear in such a war? Not, certainly, the whole armor of God here but, rather the whole armor of man, because this is a man’s war against other men. In such a war, perhaps, you wear something like this: Gird your loin with wisdom . . . put on the breastplate of self-confidence . . . let your feet be shod with the gospel of success . . . above all take the shield of security . . . and the helmet of attractiveness or personality or the sword of wit.

“The other war is not the war to conquer but the war to become whole and at peace inside our skins . . . it is the war to become a human being. This is the goal we are really after and that God is really after. This is the goal that power, success, and security are only forlorn substitutes for.

“(What we must be set free from is) the darkness in ourselves that we never fully see or fully understand or feel fully responsible for, although Heaven knows we are more than a little responsible. (Paul identifies it as,) ‘I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do.’ . . . The evil in ourselves as individuals is greater than the evil that we choose, and that is great enough. This is the darkness which we need to be liberated from in order to become human.

“It is for this war, not the other one, that we need the whole armor of God . . . He is the truth about who man really is, about what it means to be really human, and about who God really is . . . In the great war of liberation, it is imperative to keep in touch always with the only one who can liberate.

“Even if we do not find our place in the sun, or not quite the place we want, or a place where the sun is not as bright as we always dreamed that it would be, this is not the end because this is not really the decisive war even though we spend so much of our lives assuming that it is. The decisive war is the other one – to become fully human, which means to become compassionate, honest, brave . . . (this) is the war which every man can win who wills to win because it is the war which God also wills us to win and will arm us to win if only we will accept His armor.”

So I guess we are talking about the battles in our ourselves, and where we are putting our energy – are we still putting it into fighting the first battle? Or are we learning more and more to trust in God and His armor to become who we were really meant to be in Him?

What about you? Which battle are you fighting?

Weekly Word – God is God

Post author:Gina B
Post published:April 1, 2014
Post category:faith word of the year

I swear I was not living under a rock for the past decade or so – just 6,000 miles away, give or take. Somehow, during all that time, I managed to live in blissful ignorance of the conversations, arguments, and divides that are taking place in the church today. Either that, or I came back just in time to witness them. Lucky me!

I don’t share much about my personal views on controversial issues here, mostly because I don’t feel led to do so. I watch, though, as others, particularly in the past week, draw more and more lines in the sand intended to separate one faction from another.

It’s discouraging to see, and I can’t help feeling like our energy is being wasted on all these arguments and not on leading people to the Kingdom. It’s enough for me to just say, “Oh Lord Jesus, come now.”

So I stopped last week and said, “God, what does it look like for me to stay in this mess of a church and abide in you?” And the thought that came to mind was, “God is God.”

He is greater than all this. He doesn’t sit afar wringing His hands, hoping we get it right. He is at work, even in all this.

And that’s enough for me. In the end, all will be clear. All theological arguments will be answered. I can believe whatever I want, but in the end there will be truth and maybe I will be right and maybe I will be wrong. I just hope I can say that I lived in such a way that I drew more people to Him. I hope I am known more for who and how I love than what I am against. I hope He will say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.” I hope He will be pleased.

So today I will abide in this: God is God.

Inward not Upward (guest post at Judy Douglass’s blog)

Post author:Gina B
Post published:March 28, 2014
Post category:Uncategorized

I believe I have mentioned a leadership development time Erik and I went through many years ago called LEAF (Leadership Evaluation and Formation). It was, hands down, the most transformational experience of my life; I am a different person because of it.

Recently, my friend Judy Douglass asked me to write some reflections for her series Jesus on Leadership from my experience with LEAF. She posted it on her blog today, and you can read it here. While you’re there, take some time to peruse the series as well as other posts from Judy. She is a spiritual fire starter!

If you came here from Judy’s blog, welcome! I hope you stay and find words to encourage you in your journey. Please sign up to receive my posts by email in the box to the right, and follow me on Twitter and Facebook.

You There Yet? Thoughts on Transition

Post author:Gina B
Post published:March 25, 2014
Post category:transition

My due date with our first child was February 19th, 2000. Once that day passed, I had the vague feeling I had missed my chance and was therefore doomed to be pregnant forever. One of our teammates called from a trip in Thailand and asked me, “You have that baby yet?” I informed him that it was good thing he was in another country or I would have slapped him. Silly single guy. Never ask a pregnant woman that.

People sometimes ask me if we feel like we are through transitioning. If we’re “settled.” No worries – I don’t feel like slapping them when they ask, but I do feel like I wish there were a clearer due date, a definite answer. Sometimes it has felt like we’ll be in transition forever.

If transition is a mountain that we are trying to climb, then to be “through” transition should mean we’ll reach the top and start heading down the other side, right? And I would know if we’d done that. We haven’t.

The problem with mountains, though, is that there is no clear top. There’s no due date, no timeline. Instead, the top of a mountain is often flat, wide open spaces, with occasional ups and downs. You’re so close, but you’re still climbing.

That’s where I feel like we are, and may be for a while (thank God pregnancy’s not like that). It isn’t the arduous climb that it was, but all that took a lot out of us so all in all I’m a little tired of climbing. For the most part, we’re used to life here. Still, there are moments when I realize I operate from different values, different ways of doing things, different expectations. I still have moments when I ache for what we left behind. I’m not ready to fully embrace some aspects of life here.

But maybe the goal isn’t to be “done.” It’s to let all that we go through in life draw us closer to Him. It’s to enjoy whatever view we currently have, and I have to say, it’s a pretty good one these days. Transition is a big mountain, but it’s not the only mountain we’ve ever climbed or will climb. We just have to keep on going, trusting along the way. The journey goes on.

White Space

Post author:Gina B
Post published:March 24, 2014
Post category:word of the year

“White space should not be considered merely ‘blank’ space — it is an important element of design which enables the objects in it to exist at all . . . A page crammed full of text or graphics with very little white space runs the risk of appearing busy, cluttered, and is typically difficult to read.”

When it comes to design, I love white space. It’s so appealing. It leaves you wanting more. What does exist in the space has more impact. So why is it that I have such a hard time leaving white space in my life?

I look at my schedule like Pac Man – any open space must be consumed! nom nom nom. White space feels like a waste of time.

But God keeps calling me to white space. To slow. To less. To be still and know, or as my Chinese translation reads, “You need to rest.”

So this is my hope for the week – white space. That white space is when I remember that I am not as important as I think I am; in fact, I am much weaker and needier than I would care to admit. It is in that white space that I can receive what I need. That white space is what “enables the objects in it to exist at all.”

Guest Post: Cross-Cultural Artistry

Post author:Gina B
Post published:March 12, 2014
Post category:Uncategorized

We have had the privilege, over the years, to serve with some amazing leaders; one of the leaders I admire the most is Ken Cochrum. We served with Ken in Singapore back in the day, and we’re happy that our move to Orlando put us back on a team with him and his beautiful wife, Ann.

Ken has incredible vision and communicates with passion and conviction. All that is backed up by a deep walk with Jesus and and love for Him and others. Recently, I was honored to help edit his new book, CLOSE: Leading Well Across Distance and Cultures. If anyone has the experience and wisdom to speak to this topic, it’s Ken.

Today is the launch of his book and by way of introduction, I’m having him guest post on my blog. I’ve asked him to share a little of his heart with you. If you, or someone you know, are in leadership, his book is a must have!

Ken writes:
I loved Gina’s recent post, Do It Scared. She captures well the visceral tension we creatives face: the ambition to produce something worthy vs. the fear of putting ourselves out there.

As a leader who writes and as a musician who often plays live in front of hundreds of people, I experience that tension and fear all the time. What is leadership if not creative artistry? Good leadership is all about painting a watercolor vision in the hearts and minds of those around us while intentionally asking for, receiving, and responding to critique about what’s on our shared canvas. The fruit of this creative process is putting ourselves, or our art, or maybe even our lives, out on display where our friends and enemies are free to love it, hate it, praise it, or criticize it. Then we repeat the process.

I can think of no greater snapshot of this creative process lived out than Jesus’ prayer in the garden on the night he was taken away to be unjustly condemned, beaten senseless, rejected by foes and friends, then nailed to a cross and left to die. “My Father,” he prayed, “if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will.”

Jesus did it scared.

Our creator God invites those in his family to press into our culture and to explore creative ways to ‘do it scared’ every day. I recently completed a book that would not have made it from “final draft” to “final” without Gina’s editorial skills. In CLOSE: Leading Well Across Distance and Cultures, I observe that:

All cultures are relational; God designed people to interact. Cultures simply express their relational-ness in different ways. God’s love for every nation invites—even requires—Christians who regularly lead across cultural boundaries to take cross-cultural fluency seriously.

Thanks, Gina, for taking cross-cultural fluency seriously.

If you’re interested in reading more, please visit Amazon.com to check out CLOSE.

Ken Cochrum serves as VP of Global Digital Strategies for Cru and blogs regularly at http://www.onleadingwell.com.

Who was and is and is to come

Post author:Gina B
Post published:March 10, 2014
Post category:faith

A few weeks ago, I was wrestling with trust in God. Ok, who I am kidding? I wrestle with trusting God more often than that, but I want to tell you about this particular time. It was regarding our finances. Since coming back to America, I have found life to be more expensive. America is the Land of Opportunity (To Spend More Money on Everything).

As I was struggling to leave this in God’s hands, the phrase came to mind, “Who was and is and is to come.” It’s found several times in Revelations, referring to God. As I pondered that phrase, I realized God was telling me, “Gina, I have provided for you in the past. I am providing for you now. I will provide for you.” It occurred to me that I could say that about any aspect of His character – He has saved, He is saving, He will save. He has loved, He is loving, He will love. He has been good, He is good, He will be good. He has abided, He is abiding, He will abide with me. He was and is and is to come.

It was a great comfort to feel this sense of being surrounded by God in time (and to know that I could therefore trust Him with this issue). This I can count on. Whatever we need. Always. Constant. Faithful. Unchanging. That’s good news. He abides.

Fueled by Passion

Post author:Gina B
Post published:March 8, 2014
Post category:expectations parenting

“Just one more time, mommy.”

When our daughter was seven, she caught the soccer bug. She determined that she was going to be a professional soccer player when she grew up. I asked her what she was going to do when she was done playing professionally.

“I’m going to keep playing soccer.”
“But how will you make money?”
“People will pay to watch me play.”
“Even when you’re an old lady?”
“Yep.”

If she’s going to achieve that, she’ll need to be great, and she’s trying her best to be just that. Every day she looks up drills online, particularly goal keeping drills as right now she has it in mind that she wants to be a goalie. She comes to me and tells me, “Today, I need you to do this . . . ” and proceeds to show me my part in developing her skills.

She wants to keep going long after I am done being excited about my part. It’s always, “Just one more time, mommy.” One more shot on goal. One more throw. One more kick.

I am amazed at this determination in her. She gets tired, sweaty, dirty, sore, but she keeps going because she knows what it is she’s working toward. She will be that old lady that people will pay to watch play soccer. Or maybe she’d settle for the US Women’s Olympic team. Maybe.

What is this determination but a clear vision of what she wants, a passion for what she loves, and the discipline to keep moving toward it? So I ask myself, “What is my vision? Am I keeping it in front of me? Am I fueling my passions? Am I stepping toward it day by day, doing the hard work it takes to get there?”

What are you determined to do today?