Inward not Upward (guest post at Judy Douglass’s blog)

I believe I have mentioned a leadership development time Erik and I went through many years ago called LEAF (Leadership Evaluation and Formation). It was, hands down, the most transformational experience of my life; I am a different person because of it.

Recently, my friend Judy Douglass asked me to write some reflections for her series Jesus on Leadership from my experience with LEAF. She posted it on her blog today, and you can read it here. While you’re there, take some time to peruse the series as well as other posts from Judy. She is a spiritual fire starter!

If you came here from Judy’s blog, welcome! I hope you stay and find words to encourage you in your journey. Please sign up to receive my posts by email in the box to the right, and follow me on Twitter and Facebook.

Continue ReadingInward not Upward (guest post at Judy Douglass’s blog)

You There Yet? Thoughts on Transition

My due date with our first child was February 19th, 2000. Once that day passed, I had the vague feeling I had missed my chance and was therefore doomed to be pregnant forever. One of our teammates called from a trip in Thailand and asked me, “You have that baby yet?” I informed him that it was good thing he was in another country or I would have slapped him. Silly single guy. Never ask a pregnant woman that.

People sometimes ask me if we feel like we are through transitioning. If we’re “settled.” No worries – I don’t feel like slapping them when they ask, but I do feel like I wish there were a clearer due date, a definite answer. Sometimes it has felt like we’ll be in transition forever.

If transition is a mountain that we are trying to climb, then to be “through” transition should mean we’ll reach the top and start heading down the other side, right? And I would know if we’d done that. We haven’t.

The problem with mountains, though, is that there is no clear top. There’s no due date, no timeline. Instead, the top of a mountain is often flat, wide open spaces, with occasional ups and downs. You’re so close, but you’re still climbing.

That’s where I feel like we are, and may be for a while (thank God pregnancy’s not like that). It isn’t the arduous climb that it was, but all that took a lot out of us so all in all I’m a little tired of climbing. For the most part, we’re used to life here. Still, there are moments when I realize I operate from different values, different ways of doing things, different expectations. I still have moments when I ache for what we left behind. I’m not ready to fully embrace some aspects of life here.

But maybe the goal isn’t to be “done.” It’s to let all that we go through in life draw us closer to Him. It’s to enjoy whatever view we currently have, and I have to say, it’s a pretty good one these days. Transition is a big mountain, but it’s not the only mountain we’ve ever climbed or will climb. We just have to keep on going, trusting along the way. The journey goes on.

Related:

You Got That Kid Americanized Yet?

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White Space

“White space should not be considered merely ‘blank’ space — it is an important element of design which enables the objects in it to exist at all . . . A page crammed full of text or graphics with very little white space runs the risk of appearing busy, cluttered, and is typically difficult to read.”

When it comes to design, I love white space. It’s so appealing. It leaves you wanting more. What does exist in the space has more impact. So why is it that I have such a hard time leaving white space in my life?

I look at my schedule like Pac Man – any open space must be consumed! nom nom nom. White space feels like a waste of time.

But God keeps calling me to white space. To slow. To less. To be still and know, or as my Chinese translation reads, “You need to rest.

So this is my hope for the week – white space. That white space is when I remember that I am not as important as I think I am; in fact, I am much weaker and needier than I would care to admit. It is in that white space that I can receive what I need. That white space is what “enables the objects in it to exist at all.”

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Guest Post: Cross-Cultural Artistry

We have had the privilege, over the years, to serve with some amazing leaders; one of the leaders I admire the most is Ken Cochrum. We served with Ken in Singapore back in the day, and we’re happy that our move to Orlando put us back on a team with him and his beautiful wife, Ann.

Ken has incredible vision and communicates with passion and conviction. All that is backed up by a deep walk with Jesus and  and love for Him and others. Recently, I was honored to help edit his new book, CLOSE: Leading Well Across Distance and Cultures. If anyone has the experience and wisdom to speak to this topic, it’s Ken.

Today is the launch of his book and by way of introduction, I’m having him guest post on my blog. I’ve asked him to share a little of his heart with you. If you, or someone you know, are in leadership, his book is a must have!

Ken writes:
I loved Gina’s recent post, Do It Scared. She captures well the visceral tension we creatives face: the ambition to produce something worthy vs. the fear of putting ourselves out there.

As a leader who writes and as a musician who often plays live in front of hundreds of people, I experience that tension and fear all the time. What is leadership if not creative artistry? Good leadership is all about painting a watercolor vision in the hearts and minds of those around us while intentionally asking for, receiving, and responding to critique about what’s on our shared canvas. The fruit of this creative process is putting ourselves, or our art, or maybe even our lives, out on display where our friends and enemies are free to love it, hate it, praise it, or criticize it. Then we repeat the process.

I can think of no greater snapshot of this creative process lived out than Jesus’ prayer in the garden on the night he was taken away to be unjustly condemned, beaten senseless, rejected by foes and friends, then nailed to a cross and left to die. “My Father,” he prayed, “if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will.”

Jesus did it scared.

Our creator God invites those in his family to press into our culture and to explore creative ways to ‘do it scared’ every day. I recently completed a book that would not have made it from “final draft” to “final” without Gina’s editorial skills. In CLOSE: Leading Well Across Distance and Cultures, I observe that:

All cultures are relational; God designed people to interact. Cultures simply express their relational-ness in different ways. God’s love for every nation invites—even requires—Christians who regularly lead across cultural boundaries to take cross-cultural fluency seriously.

Thanks, Gina, for taking cross-cultural fluency seriously.

If you’re interested in reading more, please visit Amazon.com to check out CLOSE.

Ken Cochrum serves as VP of Global Digital Strategies for Cru and blogs regularly at http://www.onleadingwell.com.

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Who was and is and is to come

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A few weeks ago, I was wrestling with trust in God. Ok, who I am kidding? I wrestle with trusting God more often than that, but I want to tell you about this particular time. It was regarding our finances. Since coming back to America, I have found life to be more expensive. America is the Land of Opportunity (To Spend More Money on Everything).

As I was struggling to leave this in God’s hands, the phrase came to mind, “Who was and is and is to come.” It’s found several times in Revelations, referring to God. As I pondered that phrase, I realized God was telling me, “Gina, I have provided for you in the past. I am providing for you now. I will provide for you.” It occurred to me that I could say that about any aspect of His character – He has saved, He is saving, He will save. He has loved, He is loving, He will love. He has been good, He is good, He will be good. He has abided, He is abiding, He will abide with me. He was and is and is to come.

It was a great comfort to feel this sense of being surrounded by God in time (and to know that I could therefore trust Him with this issue). This I can count on. Whatever we need. Always. Constant. Faithful. Unchanging. That’s good news. He abides.

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Fueled by Passion

“Just one more time, mommy.”

When our daughter was seven, she caught the soccer bug. She determined that she was going to be a professional soccer player when she grew up. I asked her what she was going to do when she was done playing professionally.

“I’m going to keep playing soccer.”
“But how will you make money?”
“People will pay to watch me play.”
“Even when you’re an old lady?”
“Yep.”

If she’s going to achieve that, she’ll need to be great, and she’s trying her best to be just that. Every day she looks up drills online, particularly goal keeping drills as right now she has it in mind that she wants to be a goalie. She comes to me and tells me, “Today, I need you to do this . . . ” and proceeds to show me my part in developing her skills.

She wants to keep going long after I am done being excited about my part. It’s always, “Just one more time, mommy.” One more shot on goal. One more throw. One more kick.

I am amazed at this determination in her. She gets tired, sweaty, dirty, sore, but she keeps going because she knows what it is she’s working toward. She will be that old lady that people will pay to watch play soccer. Or maybe she’d settle for the US Women’s Olympic team. Maybe.

What is this determination but a clear vision of what she wants, a passion for what she loves, and the discipline to keep moving toward it? So I ask myself, “What is my vision? Am I keeping it in front of me? Am I fueling my passions? Am I stepping toward it day by day, doing the hard work it takes to get there?”

What are you determined to do today?

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Do It Scared


So I have this ambition to write a book about transition. I’m good at ambition – I’m ambitious about a lot of things. But most of those things are within my grasp, private, typical. Or if they aren’t, no one knows about them anyway, so they don’t know that I failed.

In this, success or failure is not something I can call. It’s something others will call. Let me tell you: that terrifies me.

So I find excuses not to write. The house is dirty. I’m tired. I don’t have enough time to really get into it right now. I need to do this project for work instead. I should write a blog post (ahem).

Why? I’m afraid that when I sit down, nothing will come. Or I’ll look at it and say, “What on earth am I even trying to say here? This doesn’t make sense!” Or I won’t have enough material. Or maybe, after all my hard work, it will still fail.

I think I keep hoping that it will magically write itself. I’m discovering that my voice recorder on my phone is my best writing friend – this book might just be written in 30 second sound bites that hit me on the 417 or in the last waking moments of the day. Still, somehow those thoughts need to get organized and put down on actual paper, and that is what I have on my plan this morning.

Which brings me back to scared. But I’ve decided that my motto right now is “do it scared.” Stop waiting to feel confident or motivated or full of ideas or like you aren’t terrified to make this dream a reality. Courage isn’t the absence of fear. It’s doing it despite the fear.

What are you doing scared today?

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The Words that Linger

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People often ask me if I am fluent in Mandarin. The short answer is “no.” To me, fluency means “I can say everything in that language” by which definition all those people who say they are fluent in Spanish after their 4 years of high school classes are mistaken.

I cannot say many things in Mandarin, like ceiling or fertilizer or thumb tack. Never needed to. But I would call myself “functionally fluent” which means I could talk about that wall above me, or the stuff to put on the ground to make the plants grow, or a small thing to make my paper hang on the wall. I am a master at talking around the word I don’t know, like a linguist game of $10,000 Pyramid.

Despite my lack of fluency, there are certain words that I adopted during our time overseas which I may never lose, as they have become part of my vocabulary. I thought I’d take the time to share them today, just for fun. And they are:

加油:(pronounced ‘jah yo’) This literally means ‘add oil.’ It’s the Chinese way of cheering people on. Like ‘you’re competing in the Olympics? 加油!’ or ‘Your husband is gone for how long? Bummer. ‘加油!’ (you can guess which of those applies to me).

不好意思: (boo how ee suh) We were taught this means ’embarrassed’ but it’s more than that. It’s the catch all word for ‘this situation is awkward for me, and probably for you too.’ There were lots of ‘bu hao yi si’ moments overseas. I seem to have them here too.

麻烦: (mah fahn) Ah, ‘mafan.’ Maybe my favorite word. It means ‘inconvenient’ or ‘troublesome’ but saying those long words is too mafan, so we say this.

那个谁: (ney guh shay) This is the colloquial way to say, ‘What’s his face.’

厉害: (lee high) Ah, ‘lihai.’ There’s just no English equivalent. It means ‘intense’ or ‘serious’ or ‘powerful’ but in a good, striving for excellence kind of way. Like, ‘he studies 6 hours a night? Wah, he’s so lihai!” said with admiration.

就是这样: (jiew sure jay yahng) ‘That’s just the way it is.’ Like when you finish cutting your husband’s hair and know that’s the best you’re going to do, you say, ‘jiu shi zhe yang.’

快点儿: (kw-eye dee ar) As parents, we often employ the phrase ‘hurry up.’ I prefer to use the Chinese version, “kuai dianr!” (with my best northern accent, adding r to the end). My kids always respond, “I’m kuai dianr-ing!!” They’re just as annoyed with it in Chinese as in English, maybe more so.

These are some of the ones that linger. They tend to come out in conversation here, even with those who don’t understand, but now that you know them you can join in with me!

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